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UsernameUser
Three tips for success in life: 1. Wine 'Em 2. Dine 'Em 3. 69 'Em. That is all.

Nimbostratus Zacket @UsernameUser

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Orange Subaru XV Crosstrek Endemic

Posted by UsernameUser - August 10th, 2014


Humans these days are essentially nothing more than mindless robots, programmed to consume.

As efficent consumers, we need the newest, flashiest new products to feel like we're sucessful in this world.

This decidedly human flaw is what I believe has allowed the sore to fester long enough to mutate into the peril which I shall outline in the next few minutes.

 

 

I know not the exact source of the plauge, but it is undeniably indefatigable in my particular region.

You cannot walk the streets without noting the scars of the disease.

What is the name of the sickness?
 

 

THE ORANGE SUBARU XV CROSSTREK ENDEMIC

 

Every single day, I see countless identical XV Crosstreks.

The car only has two model years, but I first noted this issue some time last year.

I dilligently recorded the numbers of consumer sheep infected with the virus all through today, in an attempt to prove my point.

These numbers have not been falsified.

Today, I recorded 38 Subaru XV Crosstreks. 35 were orange.

If this is not an endemic, I don't know what is.

 

People:
You're not cool for buying a certain car.

In fact, if everyone buys exactly the same car, that makes you a bit of a tool-bag, don't you think?

 

I hope this report will help to inform the masses of a plauge that is sweeping the nation.

I reccomend that you stockpile water rations and C7 Corvettes.

If I don't reply to any comments within two hours, I'll have been infected as well. Don't cry for me.

4472210_140772770992_the-2013-subaru-xv-crosstrek_100386148_m.jpg

Image Source: http://images.thecarconnection.com/med/the-2013-subaru-xv-crosstrek_100386148_m.jpg


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